That's a long story. It first began occurring to me, back in 89, as I'd started to question some of the logical basis of Big Bang Theory, as well as dealing with the everyday feedback loops of my own mind. Here is an essay I wrote, rating some of the cosmological issues;

https://johnbrodixmerrymanjr.medium.com/the-confessions-of-a-cosmic-heretic-5cd4c044b8ea

The most recent thought occurred this summer, in realizing that as waves are the most elemental form/pattern, they tend to either synchronize, into one larger wave, consequently it is centripetal, or harmonize, as the energy is distributed out across space and equalized, so it is centrifugal. Which explains nodes and networks, organisms and ecosystems, particles and fields.

Consider that gravity is a centripetal effect and the largest expression are galaxies. At the center of which are black holes, yet what seems to be overlooked when discussing them, is that quasars eject much of what falls in, as giant lasers out the poles and lasers are synchronized light waves. So if we considered mass as an effect of this centripetal effect, rather than gravity as a property of mass, it would explain all the excess gravity as synchronization across the entire radiological spectrum, not as some otherwise invisible mass.